hahah i realised i haven't posted about lgtwo's numerous meetings!!

#1 iceskating!
okay i didn't go i was supposed to la but in the end it was SO EX and i had massdance stuff and i was kinda sick so yeah didn't go. anyway kallang is so damn far and $16.50 for two hours is SO not worth it. heard they had lots of fun though! mm i wanna go iceskating! i haven't been since like p3 but why must it be so ex/far away):

#2 myhouse!
we were supposed to meet for dk worship prac la but in the end we only did that for two hours tops? hahah rest of the time was spent eating pizza (4 boxes gobbled up by 7 people!) and playing cards (speed, cheat, taiti etc.) but we had a super good time la! then sarah lindee sam stayed over 'cos abi's mum didn't let and well, obviously gerald can't stay over right:X hahah we helped sarah make her pudding thing for her tarts and then we ate the leftover pudding yumz(: then we played go fish! and by then we were slightly drunk or something. AND AND AND we played truth or truth because there was nothing to dareXD but well there wasn't anything much to truth either la as in like whenever we play truth or dare it's always the same questions: who's your crush/which guy in (insert place) do you want to date/generally stuff about guys. i suppose there's nothing much else to ask laXD then we "went clubbing and got boyfriends"! yeah we were definitely drunk.

#3 eastcoastpark!
whooooooo so fun la! met lindee sarah gerald at kap for breakfast first and it was rainingD: but we prayed hard and in the end it stopped raining by the time we finished eating yay! God is awesome like that:D met abi at the busstop opposite then bussed then mrt-ed to payalebar to meet nicole. HAHAH the greenline train had to go and terminate service at aljunied which is like one stop from payalebar and nicole had already waited like half an hour for us so she was so MAD that she had to wait EVEN LONGER and she was like i want to sue smrt ah! anyway by the time we bussed to eastcoast from there it was like 1? so we rented bikes for 2 hours. sarah noob la can't cycle so she rode tandem with lindee but they gave up after a while and just went to the beachXD so me nicole abi gerald rode ALL THE WAY from carpark C to carpark G leh! which is like super far cos we rode there and back so it's like what, 10ish km! okay fine maybe it's not that far but i hardly cycle la so fun! then nicole fell downD: and then i rode to the beach to get sarah cos lindee came back alone on the tandem. then we ALL went to the beach WHICH WAS LIKE THE FUNNEST:D we climbed up onto this huge rock thing and sat there and looked out at the sea. then we did a jumpshot. actually no we did 3 jumpshots, one each for abi's nicole's and my cameras. then sarah and gerald dug a hole so deep they reached water. then lindee and sarah got TOTALLY soaked and were just sitting there in the sea. and abi kept squealing whenever the waves came in. then we all went to mac's to eat lunch at 4. then went home.

#4 ritz-carlton!!!
this was like the poshest outing of all:b sarah and sam came over early in the morning to work on the puppet show for mission trip, then we bussed down to rafflescity for lunch. ate at soup spoon and sarah the ano had a salad. i had pumpkin soup and sam had clam chowder and we all had garlic foccacia. and we helped sarah eat her apples and carrots from the waldorf salad. then we got canele's macarons for xinjin and a mrsfield's browniecake thing for kiat. and sarah and sam got fried marsbars. AND XINJIN WAS SO NICE she cabbed down from raffles place just to pass us the hotel card so we wouldn't have to wait till 5.30 to get in! and we felt so guilty): and we kinda got lost were a bit disorientated BUT we found our way to THE RITZ-CARLTON in the end! and OMG. it's so posh! the room was small BUT THE BATHROOM VIEW!!!!!!!! and we were on the phone with abi for like half an hour trying to give her directions from marina square to the ritz. we were useless and made her jaywalk the same road twice:B and then later on we found out we were giving her wrong directions wups:X and we were laughing our heads off the whole time we were on the phone. so finally abi found her way to the ritz and she came to the hotel room and we all had a grand footspa(: and we emulsified moisturiser and soap to put into the water and it smelled so nice(: and sarah went out to get donuts for us cos we were SO HUNGRY thankyou sarah(: and lindee called and got freaked out by abi who picked up my phone and sounded so much like a guyXD AND AND AND AND AND OMGOMGOMGOMGOMG OUR PRANK ON ENGKIAT! okay to be fair we did it to xinijn and gerald too but they didn't fall for it only kiat did:b and he was like traumatised all the way into dinner. aiyah lazy to say what the prank was but i must say we pulled it off very very well! went sakae for dinner at like 8.45. was quite yummy but i was so freaking cold! and i felt so bad after that cos the bill was like $144 and xinjin and kiat split the bill BUT LIKE so ex la): then mum and dad came and gave abi and sam a lift home then i got home and i was so tired.

hahah it's so funny everyone's parents are getting very suspicious 'cos we keep going outXD but lgtwo is so spastic and fun!

choir + sheeren's house tmr so fun yay byebye:D

whee went eastcoast with lgtwo today so FUNNNN:D though i'm sunburnt and my legs are KILLING me, like really absolutely killing me. met some idiotic guy in the stupid carpark what's his problem la we're freaking kids la still want to be so vulgar. so illbred. and well, i can't believe we're so brave to ahem talk about people when they're within two metres:b but it's not mean stuff la just passing random comments HAHAH. eeh  i don't feel like blogging much nowadays HAHAH. i'm going to blogsurf now yay byebye:D

 

 

( meme! ripped from maria )

meme ripped from hudunit 
MOUTHOLOGY

Q. What is your salad dressing of choice?
A. mayo:D

Q. What is your favorite fast food restaurant?
A. mac's!

Q. What is your favorite sit-down restaurant?
A. anywhere with japanese food(:
 

Q. On average, what size tip do you leave at a restaurant?
A. i don't leave it, whoever's with me leaves it if we're like abroad. singapore forgeddit la.
 

Q. What food could you eat every day for two weeks and not get sick of?
A. icecream(: and more icecream and more and more and MORE! 

Q. What are your pizza toppings of choice?
A. CHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEZE. 

Q. What do you like to put on your toast?
A. nutella, butter, peanutbutterandjelly.. depends hahah 

TECHNOLOGY

Q. What is your wallpaper on your computer?
A. it says rgschoir sing for the love of music ohyeaaahh manz:D :D

Q. How many televisions are in your house? 
A. ehheh 3. my dad went a little bit gila. 

BIOLOGY

Q. Are you right-handed or left-handed?
A. right.

Q. Have you ever had anything removed from your body?
A. uhh part of my toenail that got ingrown?

Q. When was the last time you had a cavity?
A. n-e-v-e-r e-v-e-r HAHAH on you! 

Q. What is the last heavy item you lifted?
A. hmm. my violin case? 

Q. Have you ever been knocked unconscious?
A. nah

BULL[CRAP]OLOGY

Q. If it were possible, would you want to know the day you were going to die?
A. well. why not? if it's soon i'll know i have to do something about all the things i haven't done anything about soon (quite a lot actually), if it's far off i'll know i have time to figure things out (i haven't figured much out). i only don't want to know if i'm like gonna die inbetweenish, like not soon and not long off. does that make sense?

Q. If you could change your name, what would you change it to?
A. i likes my name thankyouverymuch!

Q. What color do you think looks best on you?
A. uhh. i don't exactly go around comparing colours to see which i look best in. but i guess.. white? prolly not a dark colour since i'm kinda tanned hahah.

Q. Have you ever swallowed a non-food item by mistake?
A. well. i ate the rose garnishing that looked like keropok to me but wasn't. but that's kind of still food. and it wasn't a mistake it was quite deliberate. hey it looked yummy okay and i was hungry! but no i don't think so. 

Q. Have you ever saved someone’s life?
A. i don't think so? 

Q. Has someone ever saved yours?
A. figuratively yes. like helping me in some way hahah.
 

DAREOLOGY

Q. Would you kiss a member of the same sex for $100?
A. DUH.

Q. Would you allow one of your little fingers to be cut off for $200,000?
A. OWCH NO! 

Q. Would you never blog again for $50,000?
A. ehheh i kinda don't blog that often already can't be that hard to stop rightXD 

Q. Would you pose naked in a magazine for $250,000?
A. no way. i don't get people who do that.

Q. Would you drink an entire bottle of hot sauce for $1000?
A. dude, i can't even take like the MILDEST spice. sure i'm gonna drink a bottle of hot sauce. 

Q. Would you, without fear of punishment, take a human life for $1,000,000?
A. what kind of moralless freak does that?

DUMBOLOGY

Q: What is in your left pocket?
A. don't got a left pocket.

Q: Is Napoleon Dynamite actually a good movie?
A: sounds like a war movie. i don't like war movies.

Q: Do you have hardwood or carpet in your house?
A: carpets EVERYWHERE. dad's gila-ness again. 

Q: Do you sit or stand in the shower?
A: sit? like, on the floor? uh, no. i stand.

Q: Could you live with roommates?
A: i think it should be quite fun if you get along:D but i think i'll make a bad roommate i'm a nightmare to wake up (HAHAH SO IRONIC) plus i'm super messy and disorganised heh. and i can get Really Grumpy and Impatient. 

Q: How many pairs of flip flops do you own?
A: flipflops like solely slippers? 3. 

Q: Last time you had a run-in with the cops?
A: i am Good and Law-Abiding.

Q: What do you want to be when you grow up?
A: hmm. i'll tell you when i've grown up/figured that out, whichever comes first.

Q: Who is number 1 on your top 8
A: who? like person? there's a top 8 list of people i didn't know that. well, God i guess.

LASTOLOGY

Q: Last Friend you talked to?
A. kai'en hahah, over msn.

Q: Last person who called you?
A. angie (cousin)
 

Q: Person you hugged?
A: don't know heh. can't remember. my brother maybe?
 

FAVORITOLOGY

Q: Number?
A: SEVEN!
 

Q: Season?
A: winterrrrrrr i love snow!

CURRENTOLOGY

Q: Missing someone?
A. i guess.
 

Q: Mood?
A: pissed that thestupidschoolcouldn'tjustgiveusaholidayandmadeusgobackforCONGRESSOHJOYHOWPRODUCTIVEANDPROMISING. uhh, quite happy(:

Q: Listening to?
A: lift up your eyes by planetshakers<3

Q: Watching?
A. the screen? and the letters popping out?

Q: Worrying about?
A. something i shouldn't be. and results, duh. 

RANDOMOLOGY

Q: First place you went this morning?
A: to the toilet to wash up and go to school BECAUSE okay i shan't get started.

Q: What can you not wait to do?
A: hmm. a lot of things actually.
 

Q: What’s the last movie you saw?
A. house bunny! amg FUNNY MUCH! but so, so sick. my brain=.= 

Q: Do you smile often?
A: quite. i just smiled when i saw the question. i think i smile when i see the word smile. 

Q: Are you a friendly person?
A: yeah, but sometimes it doesn't seem so heh.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH LAST ONE LAST ONE LAST ONE. finally(:

mehh just yelled at my bro cos he smartly switched off the mains and the internet along with it smart right! so he stomped off downstairs and proclaimed to my mum that i'm an angry beast when i get angry.

hmm, interesting.

i am eating lunch. macaroni&salmon yumyumyumyum.

7 down 3 to go! i am DAMN scared for math because I Do Not Get Freaking Circles Or Similarity And Bloody Congruency. and it's gonna take up a lot of questions i think and this stupid paper is 35% wth and if i don't get those two stupid topics I CAN FAIL ONE OKAY. at least if i didn't get graphs it's only one question.

zuowencompogeogphiloenglishlithistory down so far. fairly okay i suppose. hahah totally guessed question for history and lit so like(x strangely, like i was telling kai'en, this round of exams seems easier than like myas/2007's exams. it feels like it's passing faster too but i suppose that's cos it really is shorterXD (or is it? i think it is) then kai'en was like yah but that's scary cos if you think it's easy it's either it really is very easy or you're just not getting stuff correct that's why it seems easy, so you either do very well or very badly. ohboy.

listening to music makes me go to sleep even faster than when i just lie there waiting to fall asleep. I LOVE IL DIVO:D :D on the cd whoever sings the first verse and last chorus of everytime i look at you has a DAMN HOT VOICE:D srsly.

i'm quite bored. i should be studying math so i have a hope of doing okay. but.

'cos i'm lost everytime i look at you

/edit: i found out which guy it is it's the sebastien guy:D but the girls in the video are annoying they keep squealing.

my latest colour obsession(:
just finished writing my personalexpo. i'm scared. i may have good points but somehow i doubt i have a personal tone. and i'm scared during the exam some ulu topic like "will technology eventually be the downfall of man?" will come out and then I HAVE NO EXAMPLES like what ohyeah our toasters will totally kill us one day. SHEESH.

ponning school tmr to mug jap^^ yay i think moelc's awesome to allow us to pon school(: argh i really need to start mugging cos like i've only done notes for ONE set of geog notes. i have to:
-MUG JAP MUG JAP MUG JAP
-read english pe notes
-read geog articles
-read history notes and fill in merger worksheet
-revise math omgoshiamgoingtodieformathhalpme.
-read mov more detailedly so i can actually quote something relevant besides "in sooth i know not why i am so sad'
-i'm sure there's more.

you might as well kill me.

ohmanz so sianD:16 more days of this.. stupidstupidstupid. I HAVE SO MANY THINGS I WANT TO DO. i want to:
-GO SHOPPING:D :D :D
-go iceskataing!
-go people's house/invite people over
-HAVE CHOIRRRRRRRR!
-not get my results back
-swim
-play basketball
-play badminton
-SLEEP AND SLEEP AND SLEEP

the list goes on.
off to
do something productive.
huh.

i am SO bored.

i've eaten 3 lollipops in 4 days. sunday, monday and today. very good. but they're organic so it's okay right? and it's pomegranate flavoured. fine the sunday one was cola and fizzy but that's only one. and yah two pomegranates balance out the cola cos fruits are healthy(:

i ate a mooncake just now. the skin was like, superduper superduper soft. even though it came from the fridge. it's like - okay it's not like normal snowskin skin, it's waaaaaaay softer. like a really really really soft marshmallow. i'm surprised it even kept its shape. anyway it was from like raffles hotel super posh cannn with champagne and truffles insideO: but i still liked the skin:D

lunch with pris and carly today<3 went shaw after much confusion. me and carly  carly and i waited for pris (who was counting bacteria) who was LATE. we were playing with the rockclimbing rope thingies. then almost had to board same bus as __ and we were so thankful she didn't take our bus phew. carly and pris are the most confused people. anyway so we went shaw upstairs i had macs they had kfc. i don't get how people can be full eating chicken and drinking mountaindew/rootbeer. i ate a burger and fries and drank coke and i was NOT full. but they were like oh so full so full. THEN we took a video. well actually carly took a video of me and pris, but pris was the lead character(x she's the spasticest person i know. so after a lot of laughing, we headed off to wheelock. but before that we went out through the WRONG door (it lead to the up escalator) so we had to walk all the way to the other door. and it's not my fault i didn't see the handles okay that post thing really looked like the openingD: so we found the handles and opened the door and went down. wanted to get haato at wheelock but IT WAS ALL BOARDED UP NOOOO MY HAATO! so in the end i couldn't get icecream and i was still hungry): went down to marksandsparksencer with carly and we got CARAMEL CHOCOLATE:D :D :D to share. $1.30 each for three to four biggish pieces not bad la(: i wanted to but everything cos it was ALL CHOCOLATE but boh lui):

then speech day. so rubbish. and all the random music kept getting on our nerves. our game didn't progress very far ohwell. oh we were TRYING to decide busking name+costumes but erh not very successful. everything's too ex/skimpy/weird/outdated/wrong for costumes, and for names it's just hard to think of A-names. a certain someone cawing _____________! _______________! at the side doesn't exactly help either. ahwell hopefully we decide something soon. by 9th jan definitely have to la so.

i realised i wrote a lot about food. but i like food. food makes the world go round. if i don't have food i get grumpy. especially when i'm bored. i always need food when i'm bored to help me feel not so bored. i don't know i like eating(:

okay i should study for lit now blehh. imma flunk everything and get some random 2.8 or something for overall. ohsnoessssss.

i know it's dead. don't ask.

stefanie <3rgschoir! says:

meaning you're not dull and stale

stefanie <3rgschoir! says:

??

esther i lost you to the summer wind. says:

dull and stale?!

esther i lost you to the summer wind. says:

i'm not BREAD, you know.

stefanie <3rgschoir! says:

yeah

stefanie <3rgschoir! says:

i know,

stefanie <3rgschoir! says:

but you need to remind me sometimes

esther i lost you to the summer wind. says:

WHAT

esther i lost you to the summer wind. says:

okay, stef, for the last time

stefanie <3rgschoir! says:

KIDDING MAN!

esther i lost you to the summer wind. says:

I AM NOT BREAD.

andand! the full context of my pm!

subtlety's the name of the game, babe. :D i don't think it's that easy. ever walked up to a crush and said 'hey, i crush on you, meaning i think you're cute but i don't wanna marry you. we cool?' -estherrrrrrr

get your daily dose of esther-quotes!

eh it's been two weeks, wowO: there hasn't been anything to blog about recently la, either that or i'm just too lazy heh. what's new?

church today was quite fun(: found out xinjin's leaving ah nooooD: now we're stuck with engkiat for the rest of the YEAR. hahah okay fine la he's nice actually(x service was like COOL. i meant to study if it was some crap sermon i didn't understand, but today revliew's sermon about evangelism was like, powerful. there was that part about the pharisees scorning Jesus for associating with the tax collectors and sinners, but He answered them it is not the healthy who need a doctor, it is the sick who need the doctor. so, so powerful and meaningful because only God would be so awesome as to think like that. i especially liked his benediction:

Lord, give me tears so i may cry when i see hurtful things
give me anger, righteousness and injustice so i can stand up for the oppressed
give me the foolishness to think i can make a diference in the world 

went for lunch at some nasilemak place, which was a SUPER refreshing change from coffeeshop food Every Single Week. then went for mission trip training and learnt about quiet time and reading the Bible. i learned A Lot. i learnt you have to soak yourself in the Bible and immerse yourself in, not just skim and gloss over the verses just for the sake of doing QT. also, God wants to hold a conversation with us through the Bible, and it's not just something cold and distant we read for facts. even when it is addressed to people like the colossians or ephesians, we must take it that it is addressed to us, that God is speaking to us personally. and well basically i learnt a whole lot about QT, like how one passage can yield so many meanings and discoveries. today was very very fruitful(:

ohno chinese pt-oral and japCA5 tmr. imma die thanks. well i guess it's now that i have to remember God will keep His promise of always being there for me, especially in these times of dire need (exams suck), and that no matter what He will always be there beside me right to the end of the ages. amen<3

EHEEI AM TIREDDDDDDD.

led the little kids for worship today(: was better than last time la at least the singers were louder plus i didn't screw up as much:x then heehee we went upstairs and conveniently missed the first offering during youth worship it wasn't intentional okay it just so happened we reached late so we just sat in class and waited for everyone to get back. then during lesson we talked about buddhism and stuff. then hmm service was quite good(: i like revkang's sermons 'cos like some of the guest speakers can give sermons on things i don't understand at all, but revkang's sermons are really good 'cos they're so relevant and easy to understand and interesting 'cos he tells so many stories(: i like stories! after service hung around a while waiting for mum and dad to pick me, talked to various people(x then went home had a ginormous bowl of chicken-pork-egg porridge for lunch then doodled while i was supposed to be mugging then went running at botanics:D it's so interesting to go running you see a lot of Interesting People.

i dowaaaaaaaaan go school tomorrowD: D: weekends are always too short. ALWAYS. i wanna just stay home and sleep and sleep and draw and play piano and violin and guitar and eat and eat and eat and I DOWAAAAAAN SCHOOOOOOOOL D:

well. at least friday's half day and there's no philo. and next monday's a holiday.

i hate school.

i'm falling sickkkk. already lost my voice but i suspect i'm getting a fever or something oh pleeaze no.

choir chalet!!! omg was super fun i tell you! damn sad i couldn't stay over, and me and carly were emoing very badly in the stupid shuttle and on the mrt. it's nice talking to carly(: and the toots are gonna organise another chalet end of the year okay and we're gonna get the secfours to come too because like most people couldn't come this time for various reasons like pris dionne etcetc. so like hopefully we can do last day of school or something then NO EXCUSE must come. you know, it's seriously very very very sad. i've a feeling we'll grow really close to the secthree batch next year, like carly says, but we'll never miss them as much as we miss this graduating batch. i mean, it's nothing to do with the secthrees or anything, it's just - something,  i don't think i can explain? and well, they had better come back a lot a lot like 3 times a month.

i have to learn how to upload photos here i tell you.
OH CAN! so it was just my laptop that was screwed(x
okay maybe another day when i'm feeling less sick):

i nearly typed something incriminating hereO: thank goodness i stopped myself. SHEESH.
keep on guessing(;

this is one day late, but

RGSCHOIR I LOVE YOU SO MUCH<3

you know, so what if we didn't exactly have the perfect repertoire, or that we could have sung louder for grease and blended more for sectionals? i seriously don't care now, because all that mattered was that we gave our absolute best, and we put our hearts and souls into whatever song we were singing at the moment, and we forgot ourselves on that stage. you know, there's so much difference between just watching a performance and actually performing, because only when you perform can you feel the full intensity of the music, when you're watching no matter how involved you are, it just cannot beat when you're singing. and you know all the pretty chords that like resonated in the hall was like ohmanz so awesome<3 AND I TELL YOU I AM SO PROUD OF THE TWOS. we totally owned sectionals okay! no offence to the ones, but my mum said our actions were more entertaining and energetic. but she said the ones had nice songs so good job ones! but TWOS:D i'm so proud of us because we finally, finally threw away our inhibitions and were superduperly enthu onstage and all our actions were like super sharp and everything and i KNOW we enjoyed ourselves. omg i love twos. I LOVE YOU TWOS! even though we had super skimpy costumes:b yes then GREASE:D :D :D i absolutely absolutely lovelovelovelovelove grease so much much much! summernights!wegotogether!thosemagicchanges!greaselightning! i don't care we are going to do all that again. the choreo is absolutely the LOVE and we were so enthu and the audience loved us and well in short i thought medley was a success:D i'm really sad this was our the last time we got to do medley and that we'll never do it again, but i'm really glad we got a chance to do it(:

i don't want to say anything about the secfours. i don't want to think about them leaving, i don't want to think of choir without them, i don't want to think of saying goodbye to our darling alternate batch. even though i know it's not goodbye forever because they'll still come back to visit, it's not the same, it never will be. i mean, we'll never get to talk to them as often (like 3 times a week), never get to say hi to them around school, never get whacked by them on the butt (fiona), never get to accuse them of stalking us (mich), never laugh at them all the time (guiqi and sam) and all that.

no, i don't want to think about it. not just yet.

you know, all the talk about pass it on has made me think of likesunshine.

in about 4 days, everything this batch of rgschoristers has worked for will be showcased, and then it will all come to a close.

and when i think about it, there will be this huge unpluggable hole in my life. because nothing can ever replace those hours of talking to batchmates and juniors and seniors, and playing retarded games like the thumb game and the staring game, and hearing all our voices blend into the perfect chord, and all the really cool effects we can create, so much better than all those fancypants hollywood stuff.

for the juniors, it will mean they've grown one year as a chorister, and hopefully also one year in listening to others, paying attention and working hard. and i really really hope they've all come to love rgschoir like we all have.

for my batch, well, it means we've come another year in rgschoir, and i daresay we've come closer as a batch. yes, this in spite of our failed batchblog hahah. and i know deep down inside we all feel something special for rgschoir, that something that's keeping us working hard these last few days before concert, putting every effort into memorising scores, nailing choreo enthuly and everything. and yes, as we're sending off yet another batch of seniors, this time our dearest, dearest alternate batch, it only reminds us that we're growing up yet another year.

and i know i'll miss my darling seniors to bits. i love you guys<3 well, it's their last concert as part of rgshoir, and i really truly hope it'll be a memorable and special one for them, knowing that this is what we've come to under their leadership. they've been such sweet and awesome seniors, and they've made my experience in rgschoir absolutely fabulous and because of them, we've come to love rgschoir as our second home. and yes, i'm still glad i chose choir over band, because the people in choir are so <3aaaagh. in band they're PETRIFIED of their seniors, i can't imagine anything like that with our dear alternate batch<3

so, it's 4 days to concert.
rgschoir, let's own this.

you have it freaking easy you know. you're the only reason i can feel all these funny emotions. you're the one who makes my heart go aflutter whenever i'm near you, the one whose eyes i always get lost in, the one who makes me cramp up with the pangs of missing you. maybe that's why you're the one i expect the most from. andyet, you remain stupidly oblivious to everything, or so it seems. i can only wish i had the courage to tell you, or that you had never appeared in my life in the first place, or appeared as someone else in a different role. but no, the fact is that you have appeared as who you are, and you have made an inmpact on me. and well, i know i'll never have the guts to say anything to you. well, not literally nothing, but nothing that would mean anything, because i do talk to you. in short, GRAWR you for being able to to impact me so much without doing much actually.

I CANNOT BELIEVE PASS IT ON IS OVERRRRRR.
AND AFTER YOUTH SUNDAY WE WON'T BE DANCING THE DANCES ANYMORE.
AND WE'LL NEVER BE DANCING APOLOGIZE AGAIN!
NOT EVEN ON YOUTH SUNDAY!
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH.

idk, i guess pass it on was really awesome for me because like all that time of preparation, all the sunday afternoons spent practising in the music room, bonding with the other dancers and being totally spastic most of the time, it's like. something i think God granted me because you know in the process of getting ready for the concert, rehearsing and all that, i've made new friends and strengthened existing relationships and i really praise God for that 'cos i know He was the one who made everything possible! and dancing for Him on that stage on saturday night was almost magical because it's like He was watching over me, helping me through the moves when i blanked out sometimes, because my arms and feet just moved of their own accord and it felt so great because it really felt like God was moving me. and that made me smile(:

so what can i say? even though the concert's over, the impact it has left on me is still existing. and well, i guess like lindee said, "i can't believe so much practise is only for that 10 min of performance", it was well, well worth it, many times over. there really is nothing like the real performance.

and let me tell you, Bl.in.G officially owns.

waiting backstage was really fun too! after apologize we went backstage to listen to the youth worship team and amg we had such a great time la! like we were totally hyper jumping up and down and singing and doing spastic actions but everyone was having this humongously great time and doing everything very enthuly! and of course, in those 2 minutes before we're on, feeling the nerves and the butterflies fluttering around inside you, it was just so great because well. idk it's so hard to explain(x but nothing can ever replace the concert itself, i know that. I LOVE WAITING BACKSTAGE AND CHEERING FOR THE PERFORMERS ONSTAGE AND SINGING ALONG WITH WITH AAAH<3

the dancing, the singing, the screaming, the loving.
&& so, pass it on

bishh school tomorrow again. i can't believe it i have to wake up so early and go to school just about everyday for the next uhm 3 months or so! maaaaaan this is so depressing i haaaaaate school. felt like i didn't have a weekend can! it's like crazy la aaaaagh i can't believe i have to endure this for so long more aghaghagh.

anyway. church today was okay. not really as fun as usual for some weird reason. maybe 'cos it was raining and everything was so grey. okay i'm crapping but agh dance i totally dieded the moves are like O_O andand i don't get it and concert is in uhm 2 weeks? yeah so i'm kinda screwed. and the masks we have to wear for apologise look so scary can! totally gonna scare all the little kids.

then hmm ohnoes likesunshine is in 2andahalf weeks and i'm kinda screwed for that too 'cos i HAVE NOT MEMORISED ANYTHING except look to this day and te quiero and we go together and these magic changes. shitshitshit. but well, after concert- actually i don't really wanna think about after concert because then our dear alternate batch'll be gone, albeit unoffficially. the when the official handover comes.. ahhshucks i really am gonna miss them! i mean, i've grown really close to some of them it's like quite sad la i guess to imagine choir without them): hahah and soptwo won't be the same without guiqi and kayleigh's crazy wackiness. ohno. ohno this is so sad can i just forget about itD:

you and your twisted words

i'm feeling really stupid now.

sam: my friend and i walked here just now.
me: you brought your friend home?! did you tell mum?
sam: uhm no cos i was in a rush.
me: WHAT?!
sam: eh okay okay i'll tell her later! (explains the whole thing)
me: (after a few interjections) oh okay. well you'd better go tell mum.
sam: okay. (to himself) sheesh, so hard to explain to her..
[her actually refers to me]
me:  so what, you're not gonna tell mum?
sam: uhm no, i meant it's hard to explain to you.
me: (just realise he was talking to himself the previous line) ..oh.

choir was - amusing. yeah. like sectional item the whole day. basically the fun part was like after lunch we came back and started playing truth or dare before singing and i tell you kayleigh is like the ultimate stalker can she knows everything! i told her that then she was like hehheh stef i don't know anything about you. like i'm going to tell her anything if there was anything, which there isn't. that's a lie but yeah.

anyway yeah but then it kind of flopped because uhh. as sam put it, "because of YOU, kayleigh!" not really la but uhh it still flopped cos like everyone was hemming and hawing. especially the secones. actually only the secones because they basically asked the secones. then yeah after that was crazy little thing called love choreo which is so spastically grossly suggestively nice. like, okay i think you have to see it to get it. i'm partnering kayleigh who is like this whole head++ taller than me thanks. i'm so glad no one's coming to watch that i actually know, besides my family. 

ohmyfreakcanijustlikeboxyounownownownowyouarecreatingsodarnmanyproblemsformecan'tyoujustpleaaaaaaasegoawaaaaaaaayandstopbotheringmeandmakeupyourmindabouteverythinganythingeveryone.
andlikecanyoushowyourfreakingchoicebecausethinkyouwhatoctopusahsomysteriousshootinkineveryone'sfacethenscootoffandleavepeopletocleanupforyourightOHGROWUPPLEASEACTYOURFREAKINGOLDAGEFORONCE!

sometimes i think my thoughts must look like that when written out.

srsly i'm feeling so ugh now because like yah these few days were like siao and i have to chiong this out in about 9 minutes because i have to get off the com after that and yah basically i want to post before i have to fly off agh and ohno there's choir tmr at 8 imma die cos my dad ain't in singapore then i have to wake up at WHAT time to take bus aiyai. but nevermind choir's fun:D

uhm today was like quite cool la like we went mac's during lifegroup after bullying engkiat and omg i tell you damn gay engkiat got like a happy meal breakfast which came with this kungfu panda monkey toy and he was gaying around with it like cos the toy itself is really gay and he pushed some button so many times it got stuck and sam had to unstick it for him. and i got pictures mwaha of him posing with his happy meal box and the toy. he was carrying the box around in church damn gay can. then after thattttt oh service. was okay la but the sermon was like abut fathers? so didn't really pay attention cos uhh it doesn't really apply to me and won't ever so. but ah i didn't exactly accomplish mission 1 today nevermind next week eh abi? next week must accomplish mission 2 too, but that's kinda not really up to me so. yeah. then oh yes lunch me and abi walked to the coffeeshop first then there was no one and we weren't hungry after mac's so we walked back to church then waited for grace and kegan then walked there again and i had an iced milo. i drank two milos today wow. lunch was quite amusing. then went for dance. ah well at least i can do in time with the music now just the steps are like grosssss. and OH we were trying to find our funny bones. or rather abi was. and she couldn't find it then kegan was like if you knocked it why don't you laugh then i was like uhm it's not funny like hahah funny it's called the funny bone cos it FEELS funny when you knock it, yeah? then he was like OH. and anyway i found abi's funny bone and she cackled when i jabbed it and refused to let me jab it again hmpf. aiyoh abi siaosiao one you and your crazy slipper snatching. heehee dance was really quite amusing and nice today:D

GAH ONE MINUTE ONE MINTUE WHAT TO SAY UHM UHM UHM OKAY NEVERMIND WISH ME LUCK ON MY MISSION(S) NEXT WEEK KTHX BYE.

 DON'T YOU THINK IT'S AMAZING HOW GOD MOVES PEOPLE. OHMAN I THINK IT'S SO AMAZING I KNOW I ONLY DID WHAT I JUST DID BECAUSE HE MOVED ME TO. HE'S JUST SO AWESOME I LOVE GOD I ABSOLUTELY LOVE HIM SO MUCH.

i doubt i've ever been this mixed-up in my life. nothing is as it seems anymore you know? it's like, i think everything's okay, but something will tell me no, everything's not okay. and then i don't know what's going on anymore and i get really confused. and well, i find it scary when you don't know what people are really thinking. i mean not that they're two-faced, but someone can be totally happy but actually deep down inside something's killing her but you don't know 'cos you can't tell. and well, i find that scary because think how hard it is. not only do you have to hide that you're down, you also have to act happy. huh, i don't know whether i can do it.

today was superduper fun! stayed back after church to play "board games" cos there wasn't any dance, but turned out we didn't play any board games at all hahah, only saboteur and press conference(: hee i had loadsa fun and had a good time laughing with abi and sarah during service and lunch too:D sometimes i think it's therapeutic to act really childishly, doing stupid things like mixing leftover milo with jasmine green tea and green and red chilli and chicken chop sauce and noodle soup and horfun gravy then stacking the empty green tea can in the cup and sticking another cup right next to it in case the people collect the cups before we can zao so they don't see the gross thingy inside till they pour out the stuff to wash it and think hey why's there chilli in here? and everyone laughing because abi started laughing and we all can't stop 'cos we've all gone crazy already and can't eat/drink/swallow because we're laughing too hard and anything that goes in might come flying out immediately.

i think it's good to laugh. i think people who don't laugh must die earlier. like, ten years earlier, at least.

sigh. school is starting so soon. this wasn't even considered a holiday please. it was more like a "short break". or something cheesy like that. i think in secondary school if you want a holiday you need to fly off to some ulu country like the minute school's out and only get back the night before school starts. because otherwise FORGET about resting, with all the random stuffs the school decides to heap on you including STARTING SCHOOL TWO DAYS EARLIER. i think that's just the worst thing. everybody else starts regularly it's just two days SHEESH.

ahh. that was nice. okay i'm off to do other stuff.

just little baby steps

i could scream now. dont you ever wish there was a book where you could just flip and find out whats really going on instead of getting knocked off your feet about 90% of the time? dont you ever want to just give up and hide in a corner and never face the world again? dont you ever want to just cry on that someone's shoulder? dont you ever just want a hug?

well.

oikos was such a blast! i made so many friends nyah and ruth is actually a really cool book i never realised hahah. i'm so freaking tired because for the three nights i slept at 11.30, 1.30 and 2.45 and woke up at 7.30, 8.40 and 7.45. was late for breakfast (missed it actually) like the second day 'cos we played like siao the night before but strangely the next morning we were on time even though we slept later and everyone else was late hah. and i'm still damn tired because today had dance for four hours okay. and like hardcore learning all the steps because i missed last week i just about died thank goodness no choir tomorrow i can sleep in. i'm so freaked i doubt i can perfect the dance in a month prolly embarrass myself on stage. well, at least i don't get stage fright, one worry cleared i guess.

then again, sometimes its better not to know the truth.

see you around, then.